i was once a very different person who never could cherish what i had till it was too late. when i realized that i had to, and i started treasuring what was dear to me, the people around stopped caring about me and what i did. i tried many a time to hold on to what little was left and hope for the better but all i got in return was more pain, disappointment and frustration. perhaps my heart was stabbed so many times before that the feelings of hurt and rejection became all too common. slowly and unexpectingly, that sweet innocent joy i filled my heart with vaporized over the years.

when i think of love, i hardly ever think of happiness, contentment or fulfillment. these feelings were replaced with anxiety, insecurity and uncertainty. i stopped feeling happy about love, or the idea of love. instead i worry constantly about whether the other party appreciates what i'm doing. so i decided i might as well freeze my heart and be an ice queen. it is what i have been for so long that when someone comes along and manages to melt that stoned cold heart of mine, i become all too eager to please. perhaps the adrealine rush excites me.. perhaps it is the feeling of new hope that does. but then i worry that i'm too pushy and that i would make mistakes, and the worrying just won't stop. i'd be wondering what he'd think of me, i'd be wondering whether i'm doing the right thing, i'd be wondering why i'm wondering so much when i really don't have to. i feel reluctant about being direct but yet, i yearn so much to know the truth. and yes, i worry that the truth wouldn't be easy to swallow.

if you made my heart melt, but you let it freeze again, i'm sorry to say that it'd would take much more than just a fire to warm up the ice queen. sad as it seems.. she doesn't want to be an ice queen. all she wants is to love.. and to be loved in return. i just want you to hold my hand and walk with me side by side because that's all i really need.

i was once a very different person who never could cherish what i had till it was too late. when i realized that i had to, and i started treasuring what was dear to me, the people around stopped caring about me and what i did. i tried many a time to hold on to what little was left and hope for the better but all i got in return was more pain, disappointment and frustration. perhaps my heart was stabbed so many times before that the feelings of hurt and rejection became all too common. slowly and unexpectingly, that sweet innocent joy i filled my heart with vaporized over the years.

when i think of love, i hardly ever think of happiness, contentment or fulfillment. these feelings were replaced with anxiety, insecurity and uncertainty. i stopped feeling happy about love, or the idea of love. instead i worry constantly about whether the other party appreciates what i'm doing. so i decided i might as well freeze my heart and be an ice queen. it is what i have been for so long that when someone comes along and manages to melt that stoned cold heart of mine, i become all too eager to please. perhaps the adrealine rush excites me.. perhaps it is the feeling of new hope that does. but then i worry that i'm too pushy and that i would make mistakes, and the worrying just won't stop. i'd be wondering what he'd think of me, i'd be wondering whether i'm doing the right thing, i'd be wondering why i'm wondering so much when i really don't have to. i feel reluctant about being direct but yet, i yearn so much to know the truth. and yes, i worry that the truth wouldn't be easy to swallow.

if you made my heart melt, but you let it freeze again, i'm sorry to say that it'd would take much more than just a fire to warm up the ice queen. sad as it seems.. she doesn't want to be an ice queen. all she wants is to love.. and to be loved in return. i just want you to hold my hand and walk with me side by side because that's all i really need.